It was a simple plan; Get petrol, go to PC Store for Camera Case, pay Cheque in Bank (rarity), buy Cat Food and come home.
The total mileage for this should be 7 miles and take 55 minutes tops. But no, life isn’t that simple is it…..

Half way to Petrol I get held up. Two foreign Lorries avoiding the delays on the M20 due to Operation Stack have obviously switched on Sat Nav and decided to go along the narrow road where even two cars find it hard to pass in opposite directions. This was entertaining as about 15 cars had to reverse at the same time as traffic was approaching from behind.

Got to the Petrol Station. Out of the 16 pumps, I got the one which didn’t want to work. I pressed the ‘Help’ microphone, but that didn’t work either. Like magic, the petrol flowed, which was disappointing as I only had the Nozzle half way in at the time.
Went in to pay; “Cash or Cheque?”, “Do you have a Points Card?”, “Do you collect School Vouchers?”, “Are you interested in a Card?”. I was expecting “Who won the FA Cup in 1934?”, but I managed to get out OK.

On to the PC Store where I had a Voucher to spend and wanted a Camera Case. They’d sold out and the only one’s they had were £10 more expensive.
So I detoured down to their sister Household Goods Store as I knew they sold them as well.
The next challenge was the re-stacking of shelves. The Camera Cases were nicely tucked away behind two pallets and a load of goods. It was tempting not to fall over them and shout “Oh, my back, I can’t work for 6 months”, but I didn’t.
The lovely and helpful Sales Girl came to my assistance and all was well - until she tried to ring my Voucher through the Till. Three phones and two Assistants later, I was out and on my way to the Bank.

The Bank Car Park now charges. It’s fairly reasonable at 20p for half an hour and a maximum of 40p for one hour.
Next problem, I only have £1 coins, two 5p’s and 10p worth of 2p’s. It won’t take £1 or 2p coins, the Warden hasn’t any change and won’t accept me racing into the back door of the Bank, paying in and coming out.
This was resolved by someone giving me 10p. He didn’t want the 2p’s in exchange, so at least I was in profit.

In the Bank there’s a queue of about 5 people, but luckily the ‘Quick Till’ only has one. Great, but it appears the chap is being sold some service whilst he’s paying in and he’s asking questions. The five other people got served before me!

Just one more hurdle - the Cat Food. Should be simple enough, park right outside the Shop and buy it, go home and have a Coffee.
After I’d got through the two Engineering Works road lights where my way is scrooged up because people the other way are held up by others turning at the junction where I am, I go in, buy the food with a slight delay whilst person goes through every nook and cranny trying to give the Assistant the right money, I go home.

I’m one of those sad people who keep an eye on mileage. It was 12.6 miles and one hour forty seven minutes.

Oh well. I can at least have my coffee, but even this is disturbed by three cats coming in at regular intervals with the sole purpose of annoying me by meowing pathetically and staring at me.

I think that should I ever win the Lottery, I won’t buy a better car, I’ll sell it and have everything sent to me becoming a recluse with just my PC, Telly and Bed.
I’ll sort the cats out with a high tec Automatic Feeder!