The black dog is back

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rubyhen
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The black dog is back

Post by rubyhen »

{cry}

I have suffered from depression over the years and had been doing well up until recently. I have had to reduce my antidepressant medication as the medical world no longer want people to take the dose I was taking. Unfortunately the depression has returned. I have been signed off work and referred back to the mental health team so just have to wait for an appointment now.

I am managing to keep gardening and sitting with my hens - as I find that therapeutic. But feel so useless and weak - and even worse because my job is as a therapist helping people with problems like myself. But I am no good to them at the moment.

This sounds like a load of self-pitying woe! I wish the sun would come out.

Ruby {cry}

ps just had to get that off my chest.
5 hens: Keira, Dot, Beryl, Kylie and Magda.
RIP: Ruby, Ginger, Tilly, Meg and Phyllis.
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Mad Chick
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by Mad Chick »

I really feel for you, depression is such a debilitating illness {hug}
I have suffered with depression on and off since a teenager. I hope you can get an appointment soon and they can help to get you back to where you need to be. The sun WILL come out again, just hang on to that and be kind to yourself {hug&kiss}

We are also waiting for an appointment for my 15 year old son who is showing classic symptoms of depression, not helped by being in the middle of GCSE's. The GP yesterday requested an urgent appointment for him from our local CAMHS. It's taken months for him to admit there's something wrong and to ask for help.

It's not easy and can be hard for others to understand but it WILL get better {hug}
Lucy x


Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut - Ernest Hemingway
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Spreckly
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by Spreckly »

I feel for you Ruby, depression just takes all the energy and drive away. Sunshine does make a difference after days of cloud and rain. Hope you feel a lot, lot better soon.
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LittleBrownFrog
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by LittleBrownFrog »

{hug} nothing useful to add really. take care of yourself x
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wendy
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by wendy »

Sorry to hear this.
Typical everything is going fine and they change the tablets. Hopefully things will change.
Good idea to get out, especially with your chickens they are great for lifting the spirits.
{hug}
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tamk23
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by tamk23 »

Hi, just wanted to say hope it all gets sorted out soon, my sister suffers from depression and has been on medication for the last 12 years. Hoping your days are brighter soon xx
Tammy xxx

Mum to two girls Violet and Iris and Hubby! 7 chickens, Easter, Bunny, Daisy, Tulip, Primrose, Buttercup, Snowdrop, 2 silkie chicks Teddy & Rainbow. 1 cat, Gromit. 2 gerbils cheese and onion, 2 guinea pigs Bangers & Mash and my Min Pin puppy Betty. RIP my little Casserole, Hotpot & Stew x Goodnight to my wonderful cat Chance and my wonderful dog Hamish xx
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rubyhen
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by rubyhen »

Thank you so much for your kind words everyone - it's good to know that some people understand (my GP is not exactly 'at home' with mental illness - when i went to see her I said I was having negative thoughts and she said 'you don't want to think like that or it might happen!' Comfort indeed!)

Mad Chick I am sorry to hear about your son - but he is lucky to have an understanding Mum. Hope he gets an appointment soon.

And the sun has come out! I shall potter round the garden and maybe plant out some of the veg that has taken over my lounge.

Thanks again

Ruby
5 hens: Keira, Dot, Beryl, Kylie and Magda.
RIP: Ruby, Ginger, Tilly, Meg and Phyllis.
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Annie
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by Annie »

Many people have used the forum to off load for one reason or another, so long as speaking about your depression offers some relief I dont think anybody would be callous enough to object. Depression is becoming increasingly common and its about time the medics got a real grip of what this means to a sufferer . I really believe though that anything that gets you out of your chair and into the outside world, whether its the veg plot, dog or chooks , has got to be a step in the right direction. You will get there in time , wishing you well
It will be alright in the end , if its not alright, it isn't the end .
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mrs boodles
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by mrs boodles »

Ruby so very sorry to here your depression has returned, I know exactly where you are coming from. I have always been a person who gets down quite easily but the year before I really lost it depression wise due to things happening at home. I have been on antidepressants since, it is so hard when you are feeling so bad to find the positive in anything. sending you hugs, and take care. {hug} {hug}
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rubyhen
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by rubyhen »

Thank you Annie


Thank you also Mrs Boodles - my heart goes out to you as a fellow sufferer. {hug}

Ruby
5 hens: Keira, Dot, Beryl, Kylie and Magda.
RIP: Ruby, Ginger, Tilly, Meg and Phyllis.
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MissEllie
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by MissEllie »

Sending you a hug Ruby, thankfully I've never suffered from this awful illness myself but my brother does and I know how ill it makes him feel at times. {hug}
Wishing you a speedy recovery
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julie62
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by julie62 »

Hang on in there - I hope you get sorted soon {hug}
Julie

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Sara
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by Sara »

Cant add much Ruby... But im thinking of you and sending tons of hugs {hug} {hug} {hug} {hug} {hug}
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by Benny&Co »

Oh Ruby, sending you lots of big {hug}

Depression is such a truly debilitating thing and just because you can't necessarily 'see' the symptoms it's no less painful {cry}

Your GP does not sound very supportive, is there anyone else you could see in the practice?

I can't understand why, if your meds were working, they started to reduce them - and then look what happened your symptoms returned. There may well be an alternative medication for you too.

So glad you're able to get out and spend time in your garden and with your chookies, they're great for giving you a lift aren't they {hug}
Bev x
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RIP dear little Ladies - Lottie, Cottie, Elsie, Dottie, Hilda and Margie. You may have gone, but are never ever forgotten.
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rubyhen
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Re: The black dog is back

Post by rubyhen »

Thank you for all your support and lovely messages.

I have been to the alotment (was rather worried about going). There were some of the chums down there and they were all kind to me. I hoed lots of weeds and made a start on earthing up the spuds.

Benny&Co wrote:

I can't understand why, if your meds were working, they started to reduce them - and then look what happened your symptoms returned. There may well be an alternative medication for you too.



I'm on citalopram (and have been since 2000). I was up to 60mg but unfortunately there's been some studies suggesting heart probs at this level - so the recommendation is 40mg max. I am hoping that they will try me on another one as I think this one wasn't working as it used to even at 60mg.

Still awaiting an appointment with the mental health team - let's hope its soon!

Ruby
>ch<
5 hens: Keira, Dot, Beryl, Kylie and Magda.
RIP: Ruby, Ginger, Tilly, Meg and Phyllis.
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