4.30am up with the larkand ready to make my early morning alarm calls for the neighbours. Have a big stretch, shake and scratch.
Find corn from last night ,scoff quickly and crow a few more times.
Await arrival of servants, housekeeper due at 9, comes to feed me at 20 to . Get lots of praise, love and small snack, she wipes my beak and straightens any errant feathers. I then strut my stuff and tootle off into the bushes to find a tasty morsel or two.
10.30, servant comes with tea basket for the gardener and goodies for me. Jump on wooden chair and crow again, must out do next doors cockerel (keeping up with the Jones's)
Time to find a sunny spot for a snooze.....unruly neighbour decides to cut lawn and wakes me ,hurrumph , will have to do alarm call slightly earlier tomorrow! 11.35, am informed that an annonymous caller pushed a pack of paxo through the letterbox...buck buck buckaaar! hope it doesnt involve me and a kitchen table! 12.30 lunch with servants in the shed. Emmental and ham sandwiches, grapes and a nice drop of vintage rain water. Siesta , this time successful. Servants think I am dead, having stretched out fully on the warm gravel. Rudely awakend by servant insisting I keep up my fluid levels having been unwell lately. Interfering old crow! I need my beauty sleep, how else can I look so handsome? Manage 40 winks before waking to cuss at low flying blackbird. Annoyed by bluebottle, ate him! Go for walk to see where sun has gone. More tea and goodies at 3.30 and petting session. Drink from lily pool then wander round to find roosting perch for the night. Preen and fluff up feathers . Nighty night.zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz The colonel.