Making ends meet

[Richard]

Because quite a few people out and about know I run a website kind of based on downshifting, sorts of frugality but mainly living a simpler life and I'm astounded at how some of them make ends meet - so many make me feel quite well off.

I wouldn't dream of asking for personal details but have put this Poll in just to get some idea of how our Members see themselves.

Open to discussion of course.

Richard

[Mrs B]

None of those apply to me, I guess I have always lived within my means so it is like breathing to me, I don't even think about it.

[tamk23]

Done xx

[Richard]

Hi

Very honest Mrs.B. and it should be pointed out this website and forum is for everyone, whether someone is frugal or not does not come into it, just this is a very accross the board forum aiming at no one particular sort of person (A community of people sharing advice and ideas for a simpler lifestyle) and when writing articles for main site it comes in handy to know.
About 45% of people visit DTL for Chicken reasons and keeping chickens isn't necessarily frugal.

I'd say in my twelve years of a downshifting experience I've been in and out of all three and not always in that order !!

Richard

[ChrisG]

We have always had to be frugal to some extent. When everyone else had two incomes, we chose to live on one and to home educate our children at the same time (cant really do that if both are out at work). At times, Hubby was well paid, but that was by no means all the time and now we have less coming in per year than he used to earn per month, so things are tighter than ever. And we havent really had much opportunity to save a whole lot over the years either, sadly.

So how do we do it? We try not to buy anything we dont need; we take staycations instead of going abroad; we camp rather than hotel or B&B; we shop around for the bargains and make the most of food - stretching it till it breaks; we redefined what constituted a 'main meal' so we might eat soup for dinner (a hearty soup, but homemade); we also eat veggie more often than we used to; we extend the meat with veggies and beans/lentils, eating about 2oz meat each per meal and some meals are meatless; we DIY everything we are able, which is pretty much everything really; we bought a house that needed renovation (but not rebuilding) and we are DIY-ing that too (it takes so long because money is tight!); when we move to Scotland, we hope to build our own house, which will work out cheaper than buying one ready made (if we find one we like and can afford we might forgo the self build), but we will be building to wind and water tight and doing the internals ourselves to save costs.

It's an adventure and a challenge, but we enjoy it most of the time, but there are times when we wish we could just drop everything and toddle off to Italy for a week or two!

[LittleBrownFrog]

It is all about choice I think. It surprises me when I hear some members of my extended family talking about how difficult they find things financially - the things that other people see as 'essential' are very different to the things I see as essential.

[ChrisG]

My sister in law and her husband literally earn five times as much as we did in a good year yet she still complains she cant afford things - but then she does have horses and they take safari holidays in posh tents (with upstairs and balconies? What's that all about?) in Kenya for a month at a time etc.

[Sara]

It is all about choice I think. It surprises me when I hear some members of my extended family talking about how difficult they find things financially - the things that other people see as 'essential' are very different to the things I see as essential.

Exactly my thoughts too LBF

[Mad Chick]

Very true LBF

We had a similar conversation with some friends the other day who were moaning about the fact that we are going on holiday this year while they can't afford too - I did point out that I haven't bought myself a mulberry handbag, two Tag watches and a new car this year

We're lucky enough that if we watch the pennies throughout the year, we can afford a nice holiday in the summer - this is what is important to us as a family. My friends all laugh at us because they think Nick's a tightwad but you can only spend it once so we choose to spend it on something we really want

[mrswadders]

My sister in law and her husband literally earn five times as much as we did in a good year yet she still complains she cant afford things - but then she does have horses and they take safari holidays in posh tents (with upstairs and balconies? What's that all about?) in Kenya for a month at a time etc.

my sister is exactly the same, although it's the carribean for them! Our luxury holiday was to buy an old 80's caravan last year to upgrade from a tent!!!!!
This year we aren't going anywhere during the summer as hubby was out of work for a while, hopefully we may get somewhere in october once his done his pro bation.

[LisaB]

It's odd because okay, my parents don't earn much, but my best friend has it so much worse (sleeping in their car etc) that I do see ourselves as quite all right. Sometimes we don't make ends meet, we struggle to pay the bills etc and we've never been on holiday and we just get what we need, but I think, at least we've got each other and we do have what we need.

Where as my last boyfriend (who also knew my best friend) thought he had it hard, when he lives in a big house in a posh area, his parents both have expensive cars and even bought him his own brand new car, he has everything he wants, 8 guitars, huge tv in his room, insane computer system ect ect, gets to go on holiday multiple times a year, gets thousands for christmas and birthdays, its funny what some people see as a hard life isn't it?
Sorry for that little rant

[ChrisG]

When I lived at home with my parents, we never went on holiday (well, I do remember two holidays as a family inall the time I was growing up). Mum used to say we were going to 'Argate', which translated to 'Our Gate' ie, staying home. We did day trips once a week or so in the summer, but that was it - and that was for a picnic to a beauty spot or something similar.

When I got married, Hubby had always been on holiday every summer with his parents. They would do a week in a tent or caravan somewhere in Britain. His idea of summer was you had to go away on holiday, whereas I wasnt bothered. It's what you are used to I expect.

Anyway, we do go away every summer (think we have only miussed once in 33 years). These days we go to Scotland, and although we are both past 55, until this year we have gone camping (tent in field kind of camping). This year we have bought a motorhome. It is 20 years old and didnt cost a lot - paid for with money I got from my mum when she died. It's a step up from a tent anyway - last year was so cold, I really didnt want a repeat! Fuel will be more expensive due to lower mpg, but we will park it and spend the days walking and the evenings dancing (that tends to cost around £5 for both of us, so again, wont break the bank. And in Scotland, you can park up almost anywhere, thanks to the right to roam laws, so we might save on caravan park costs too. With the tent, we had to park on a site or we would have been lacking in toilet facilities

[FleurBleue]

The only things that we can economise on are food, fuel, water and electricity, all other taxes and bills are fixed, so I constantly monitor our electricity, water and fuel usage.

Food is always home made, mostly vegetarian, and there's no wastage. Any left overs appear again, and we have the eggs from the hens.

Having lived an affluent life where money wasn't really a problem and I could do, and buy, just about whatever I wanted, the realisation that our working, frantic, stress filled lives was doing us no good, and that if we didn't take drastic action I'd more than likely be tiptoeing into my dotage alone, prompted this massive change in lifestyle.

Our children were grown up and independent, so we resigned from our professions, moved to France and now exist on a very limited income. After six years, I'm surprised at how well we've adapted.

It isn't always a bed of roses, living in France is a bureaucratic nightmare, and living expenses are high, but on the whole, we're happier and healthier.

I subscribe to the Mr Micawber school of thought, and as long as I have sixpence in the bank, I sleep at night.

[ChrisG]

Hear Hear, Fleurbleue. We hope to do similar in the not too distant future, but in Scotland, not France. The plan is that every venture should be at least cost neutral and thereby everything we have will be 'free', sort of.

[aishakali]

We have had to be "frugal" for nearly all our married life, there was no choice. Its probably in the last 10 years or so that things have changed, through nothing but hard work. We can now afford to do what we want to do, hols etc, but to be honest we still live quite simply. I still look for bargains, will not buy something if I think its overpriced and begrudge expensive restaurant meals (Toby is very good!). We had to watch every penny years ago and it is hard to get out of the habit now. I have to admit it is great not having to worry if the car breaks down (a Skoda, nothing flash ) or the washing machine gives up the ghost but it wouldn't worry me if we didn't have a safety net. We were just as happy then as now